The End and The Beginning
by Hedwig Edwiges
Summary: ABANDONED. There isn't any reason in me to continue this. Sorry. AU after OotP. From the summer before his sixth year until after the final battle with the Dark Lord, my thoughts about the life of Harry Potter.
1. Prologue

_THE END... AND THE BEGINNING_

_By Hedwig Edwiges_

Disclaimer: As in a lot of fanfics I enjoyed read, this states that all belongs to J.K.Rowling and I just was lucky enough to borrow and play with it a little. I'm pretty sure I picked some influences and ideas around the corner. It wasn't my intention to copy anyone or anything and I apologize if this – inadvertently – happened.

Summary: AU after OotP. From the summer before his sixth year until after the final battle with the Dark Lord, my thoughts about the life of Harry Potter.

Author's Note: This was my first try on a chaptered story and I have a prologue and five chapters. I stopped when a friend said I wasn't going anywhere. But I also decide to publish this anyway, even if I don't know if I'll come back to it, but considering how long I take to update my others stories, there is always hope.

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_PROLOGUE_

The group stood close to the desk in the Headmaster's office. Dumbledore put the crystal stone shaped as a five-point star on the table and over it, the red phoenix feather. With the tip of his wand Dumbledore touched the middle of the crystal and the stone opened up to engulf the feather, casting a reddish glow all over the room. Then each one of the group started to chant his or her part in the spell.

"In the name of the friends of old and forever, I here deposit my faith and my love for Harry Potter, thus my strength can be added to his", Remus Lupin used the tip of his wand to touch his chest where his heart was and then touched the open crystal.

"In the name of the friends of now and tomorrow, we here deposit our faith and our love for Harry Potter, thus our strength can be added to his", Hermione and Ron spoke together, repeating Lupin's actions with their wands.

"As the new family that welcomed him in our midst, we here deposit our faith and our love for Harry Potter, thus our strength can be added to his." This time it was Mr. and Mrs. Weasley speaking together, once again repeating the gesture to touch theirs chests and then the crystal with the tip of- their wands.

"As his mentor, protector and guide from old, today and as long as needed, I here deposit my faith and my love for Harry Potter, thus my strength can be added to his." Dumbledore's voice was low and husky but his words and gestures were clear and firm.

"As his soul mate that I believe I am now and forever, I here deposit all my faith and love for Harry Potter, thus my strength can be added to his." The words were muttered with absolute conviction and no shyness by Ginny.

In the silence that followed, Fawkes, Professor Dumbledore's phoenix, flew graciously to the middle of the group, stopped on the table, inclined his head and let two tears drop inside the crystal. Then the bird went back to his perch, intoning a soothing song.

After that, Dumbledore closed the spell and the crystal, that now resembled a red star with its glow shinning from inside. Again Dumbledore flicked his wand, this time to create a necklace and attached the stone to it.

"It is done," he said. "Together with his mother gift, that runs in his blood, this is the most powerful protection charm we could create for Harry."

Sighs sounded around, between all gathered around the desk. None seemed keen to step back, to break the bond of strength enclosing all of them in that moment. Finally Dumbledore reached for the pendant and lifted it from his desk. "I'll speak with Harry and pass this on to him. Each and every one of you knows what to do. I believe the climax of this war is near. We all need to be prepared."

This seemed to be the cue for everyone to start moving and getting on with their chores. Fawkes silenced. Molly and Arthur Weasley went to the fireplace, disappearing in green fog. Ginny, Hermione and Ron turned to leave the Headmaster's office and Hermione stopped when he asked: "Could you send Harry here, please? I believe he should be in the Gryffindor common room."

"Yes, sir," she answered and the three Gryffindors left down the staircase.

Dumbledore turned to Lupin. "Remus, my friend, I believe we have reached the end of our journey. Voldemort is ready for his final assault; for he believes that in taking Hogwarts he can shift the balance in his favor. And it will be here that the Wizarding world will have to make its stand. We fight back or we crumble, no much space in-between."

The pale and thin face of Lupin was turned to the office door, as if entranced by the departure of the students or waiting for the arrival of another one. He answered without taking his eyes of the door.

"I agree, Headmaster. Those of our kind that choose to be here now will write the end of this chapter in Wizarding history. And, hopefully, also the beginning of the next one too."

"We may be the most important outpost, Remus, but certainly not the last. And you, maybe more than most, should know that the light always follows the darkness and is capable of engulfing and dispersing with it. Sometimes the night seems too long, but the sun always shines in the end."

"The question is if we have enough light to disperse the darkness that engulfs us now."

Dumbledore rose to his full height and with a glow of suppressed power in his eyes - the kind of glow that made Dumbledore's fame as the most powerful wizard alive and the only one He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named always feared.

"Do you not have faith in Harry?" He asked in a harsh voice.

"I always had the most complete faith in Harry. Sometimes I doubt the rest of the world," Lupin answered in a low voice.

Dumbledore couldn't respond to that because the door to his office opened to let in a young man, with black round-rimmed glasses over his brilliant green eyes and an unmistakable untidy mop of black hair covering his forehead and the scar that had made him famous since he was a baby.

Harry was still too thin for most people's standards. And shorter than most of his classmates. But he also had real muscles and a way to carry himself that spoke of readiness and confidence in his actions. All the same, his eyes also bore much more sorrow and knowledge of the world than any of his friends would wish for. Dumbledore and Lupin both stared at Harry's face, each looking for something there to give peace to their own troubled minds.

Lupin searched the boy's face and compared the too old eyes and crisped forehead with the donors of these features. James, Harry's father and one of Remus's best friends, would have crisps on his forehead before important tests – like O W.L.s or N.E.W.T.s – or when trying to solve a problem for Lily and his friends. But those moments never lasted long. And Lupin didn't remember having ever seen so much weight on Lily's eyes, even at the worst of the first war.

Dumbledore fixed Harry with his brilliant blue eyes, looking for any sign of uneasiness or distress. As he had thought so many times before, this wasn't how he wished for Harry to grow up. If Dumbledore were as powerful and infallible, as so many people believed, he would have been able to protect Harry from the many sorrows and pains the boy had experienced in his short life. Dumbledore would have had a handsome, confident and happy seventeen-year-old in front of him right now. But, instead, there was this boy grown to manhood far too early and too quickly, with eyes darkened from too many unwelcome thoughts and worries, and a posture that spoke of the weight over his young shoulders.

Lupin and Dumbledore sighed at the same time, but averted each other eyes, both knowing too well that _'if wishes were horses, then beggars would ride'_, a Muggle saying that never had more meaning than in Harry Potter's life.

"Hello, Remus, Headmaster," Harry acknowledged both men without trying to escape their scrutiny.

It had been a while since Harry reached the conclusion that trying to hide his emotions or his state of mind from his friends and teachers was not the best option. He coped with the attitude of each of them as just one more task he had to perform. The _real_Harry, the one who let go of his control or a reassured facade, showed himself at rare moments and to very few people indeed. And nowadays, Lupin wasn't among those few. Harry could see how much the war and the monthly transformations took from Lupin. The man was always thin and pale, regardless of the time of the month or how many times he ate at the Weasleys' home. And Harry had decided he wouldn't add to Remus Lupin's burden. On the contrary, he would do his best to lighten it.

During the summer after his fifth year, Harry spent some time immerge in a soul-searching quest and was able to understand some of Dumbledore's choices. He could even agree – grudgingly – with most. But after he learnt and accepted that the old wizard had his faults, their relationship changed. Harry spoke more freely, was able to discuss his ideas and the Headmaster's advice, even to disagree with him – from time to time. The two wizards reached an understanding toward their relationship: Dumbledore was the right wizard to follow and heed advice but he was also a human being. So Harry didn't expect Dumbledore to be perfect anymore. He just expected him to do the best in any situation. Likewise, Dumbledore expected the same from Harry.

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TBC…


	2. Chapter 01

Disclaimer: As in a lot of fanfics I enjoyed read, this states that all belongs to J.K.Rowling and I just was lucky enough to borrow and play with it a little. I'm pretty sure I picked some influences and ideas around the corner. It wasn't my intention to copy anyone or anything and I apologize if this – inadvertently – happened.

Summary: AU after OotP. From the summer before his sixth year until after the final battle with the Dark Lord, my thoughts about the life of Harry Potter.

Author's Note: This was my first try on a chaptered story and I have a prologue and five chapters. I stopped when a friend said I wasn't going anywhere. But I also decide to publish this anyway, even if I don't know if I'll come back to it, but considering how long I take to update my others stories, there is always hope.

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THE END… AND THE BEGGINING

CHAPTER ONE

During the summer before his sixth school year, Harry read and tried to practice Occlumency. Harry didn't believe he could survive much longer without some decent sleep and thought he would go mad from the visions of Voldemort's actions. And Occlumency was also his hope for his own nightmares, the ones caused by his own actions, the ones related to his guilty feelings.

His mood didn't improve much after arriving at Privet Drive. It was good that the Dursleys were given him a wide berth and didn't locked him in his room, all because of the warning from the members of the Order.

He got enough food to eat every time he mastered the will and strength to get out of his room and down to the kitchen. His aunt gave him a list of chores but didn't set a time limit or bothered him about getting them done.

And, as a matter of fact, Harry found out that physical work helped him to take his mind off things. And be tired at night helped him to have some hours of sleep before the dreams started. So, he really didn't mind do things around the house and the garden. And the best part was Dudley really trying to avoid him.

Harry knew that there was always a member of the Order guarding him, hiding under an invisibility cloak. But he never talked to any of them. The only ones who ever tried to call his attention were Tonks and Mundungus. After Harry ignored them a couple of times, they gave up on making him acknowledge their presence. But Harry could sense them, and in Tonks case, hear her around most of the time. He didn't felt ready to talk to any of them yet. He really didn't know what to say. He didn't want to discuss Sirius, the battle in the Ministry or his behavior problems from last year.

Maybe Harry would have been able to talk to Remus Lupin, but if he was ever on duty to guard him, he never announced his presence to Harry. But Harry also believed this wasn't one duty Dumbledore would give Lupin right now. He remembered the ragged face of the man on the train station. Lupin wasn't well. And now, with time and space to spare, Harry was able to recognize that he would be grieving like him, probably even more, for Sirius. And Harry almost wished for Lupin to be around because he feared the werewolf would blame him for Sirius death.

When Harry was thinking clearly – usually when his hands were occupied – he knew that this wasn't possible. Lupin was there, at the Ministry, in the room with the dais and the veil. He witnessed the fight. But in dreams, or when he was really depressed – usually when he was lying in his bed, not getting up to eat or to bath – Harry couldn't stop thinking that if he had tried harder during his Occlumency's lessons; if he didn't want so badly to know what was at the other side of that door; if he had trusted Snape to understand his message and actually do something about it; if he had listen to Hermione... Harry couldn't stop thinking that if he had done any of these things Sirius might be alive. And he feared Lupin would also believe that.

"_Why everyone I care for have to die?"_ Was the question that popped in Harry's mind more often in his depressed moments.

Hermione had explained, in one of her letters, the _'phases'_ everybody passes through when they lost a loved one.

DENIAL. That was when Harry screamed and screamed for Sirius to come back, trying to run away from Lupin's arms at the Ministry.

ANGER. That had to count for his reaction, running after Bellatrix and even attempting to cast a _Crutiatus Curse_ at her. He could include his _'conversation'_ with Dumbledore here too. After all the damage he caused to the Headmaster's office, all his yelling, there's no way to escape the definition of _'an anger moment'_ there.

BARGAINING. That would fall in his conversation with Near Headless Nick. Or could have started with his attempt to call Sirius through the mirror and then wishing for him to come back as a ghost.

DEPRESSION. Hermione said this one was related to surviving. Her example was Cedric's death: Harry felt depressed because he felt guilty because he survived and the other boy didn't. Even if the reason for all to happen wasn't Harry's fault or his decision. And Harry felt really depressed about Sirius death. He _**knew**_ he didn't kill his godfather. He _**knew**_ the choice to go to the Ministry against all orders and advises wasn't his, but Sirius'. But Harry also _**knew**_ that everything happened because of him, because of the things he did or didn't do.

ACCEPTANCE. That should be the last phase, the last step. Accept the death of a loved one; accept he wasn't guilty; accept there wasn't anything else he could do about it.

But this last step was the hardest one. Harry bounced this thoughts and memories around his mind trying to find these certainties inside himself: that he wasn't guilty; that wasn't his choice; that wasn't his doing. But they weren't there. All Harry could find inside himself were pain, loneness and despair.

On one of the mornings that Harry was sited at the breakfast table, along with the Dursleys, his thoughts were abruptly interrupted and Harry was pull down from his misery back to Number Four Privet Drive.

"You plan to do something about your nightmares or this family won't have any rest this summer?"

Harry turned to look at his aunt pinched face after the acid comment.

"What?"

"I'm asking if to endure your screams night after night falls in the category of _'treating you well'_, as yours... _freak friends_ demanded of us!" Aunt Petunia was really short on patience.

Harry looked to the other two Dursleys at the table and took in their ragged faces. Dudley looked ready to fall over his half of grapefruit.

"Ah... Sorry... I... Well, I didn't realize you could hear me..." Harry said in a small voice.

"We hear you, boy!" Uncle Vernon bummed. "Better do something about it, or no _freak friend_ of yours will save you!" With that threat, Vernon stood up, kissed Petunia's cheek and shuffled Dudley's hair before leaving the house with a last deadly look toward Harry.

After that, Harry decided that he _**really**_ needed to do something about it. And his best chance seemed to be Occlumency. He didn't want to write to Dumbledore asking about how to go on with it. He still wasn't quite sure about his feelings toward the Headmaster. He would prefer to talk in person with Lupin, but he probably wouldn't be able to help or he would have taught him last year. And to contact Snape was _**absolutely, completely, eternally**_out of question in Harry's mind.

So he asked Hermione for help. His friend was capable to produce a list with a dozen titles and indicated three she thought more interesting and helpful to him. Harry was able to buy them through owl post and was really doing his homework to learn, at least, Occlumency theory.

The others books he kept close by and switched to when Occlumency started to addle his mind instead of helping him. Especially the DADA collection Sirius and Lupin had given him last Christmas.

Harry wrote dutifully to the Order twice a week:

_Hi everyone._

_I'm okay. The Dursleys have been feeding me and didn't lock me in my room yet. It's an okay summer._

_Regards to all,_

_Harry_

With this standard text, he asked Hedwig to deliver these letters to someone in the Order and since no wizard appeared at the Dursleys' door inquiring about his well being, Harry knew his messages were somehow been received.

To Ron and Hermione he tried to write normal letters, retelling whatever he was doing or just casual nonsense.

Ron seemed to understand and never asked for anything more. He wrote about The Burrow, how the twins' shop was doing, how much work his mother was piling over him and how annoying Ginny could be when she didn't agree with him.

Hermione, on the other hand, never seemed satisfied with what he wrote. She was forever asking about how he was _'feeling'_, if he was still having nightmares or visions, how he was _'copping'_ with the situation and telling him not to blame himself. She only gave him some rest after he asked about the Occlumency books and then told her he had bought the three she recommended.

Ginny and Neville sent quick notes too. Neville would be traveling with his family for most of the summer, but told Harry he could write to him if Harry wanted to and he – Neville – would be honored if Harry considered him a real friend.

"_Honored?!"_ Harry thought after receiving Neville's letter. _"He should be afraid! Everybody that gets close to Harry Potter end up injured or dead!"_ But he wrote to Neville, saying he already considered the boy his friend and was sorry he had been hurt and had broken his father wand while trying to help Harry.

Ginny's notes were short and usually in the middle of Ron's letters. Or, at least, delivered together by a still hyperactive Pig. She also only wrote about casual things and picked on Ron.

Despite the promises at King's Cross, this summer Harry didn't ask anyone about the possibility to leave the Dursleys before the start of the new term. He didn't know if he wanted to or if it would be safe for the people around him. So he decided this time he wouldn't ask for it or even think about it. If he could escape Privet Drive and spend some time somewhere else, he would be grateful. But Harry didn't want to go back to Grimauld Place. And he believed it would be too dangerous to go to The Burrow. So, better not thinking about it at all. He also tried not to think about what he didn't know. The _Daily Prophet_ arrived every day and Harry read it from the first to the last line and told himself if this was what everybody else knew, it would be enough for him too.

It wasn't like he had a real life after all. When you pass all your life hiding from a murderous dark wizard, - even when you didn't know this was what you were doing - you don't get much chance to make a lot of friends, find a girlfriend or develop some hobbies. Your mind is always turning back to planning what to do if you are in danger. Friends and girlfriends have to pass the test of reliability. And be asked if they were interested in living dangerously.

And now he has another thing to worry about. Now he knew why that murderous dark wizard was after him since he was a baby. Now he has a real mission in his almost non-existent life. He was supposed to be the savior of the Wizarding world. _**Harry Potter was the one who could defeat Lord Voldemort. **_

And this time there wouldn't be a mother's charm of love to protect him. He would have to face Voldemort, since he was the one to mark Harry as his equal. There were just some small glitches in this plan: Voldemort was much older and experienced than Harry. He knew all about magic – light and dark – and didn't have any qualm to use it to achieve his objectives. He also had loads of powerful wizards and witches around him. Voldemort had the added advantage of the non-involvement of part of the Wizarding world because they were too scared to do something. And to roll it all in a beautiful gift wrap, Harry didn't have a clue about what kind of power he has that_**the Dark Lord knows not**_

Harry kept remembering his previous encounters and narrow escapes from Voldemort. In his first year at Hogwarts, he was saved once by Firenze, the centaur, in the Dark Forest. Then, when he faced Quirrell, who was carrying Voldemort spirit within him, the power of Harry's mother sacrifice was still his better protection and the ultimate reason for Quirrell's destruction and Voldemort's retreat.

In the Chamber of Secrets, Harry's second year at the school, it wasn't the real Voldemort. At least, not the all-powerful Voldemort. It was his younger version, still a shadow, depending on stripping Ginny's life force to be brought back to life. That time, the real adversary was the Basilisk. And again, thanks to Fawkes and the Sorting Hat, Harry was capable to win.

During his third year, Harry spent so much time thinking he had to hate and take revenge from what he thought Sirius did that he let the real danger pass by. Even with Dumbledore's assessment that Wormtail owned his life to Harry and that was a bond every wizard and witch have to honor, Harry still revived the whole thing, trying to find out what he did wrong and how he could have stopped Pettigrew to return to Voldemort.

The Tri-Wizarding Tournament, Cedric's death and all that happened in the cemetery still was a big nightmare to Harry. Be an unwilling part of the magic to give a body to Voldemort was bad enough. To feel responsible for the other boy's death was a pain Harry knew it would never go away. To know that his mother sacrifice no longer protected him from Voldemort's touch was really alarming. What happened when they tried to duel scared Harry half to death and, at the same time, filled him with so much hope that everything after that became a blur in his mind. When he told Dumbledore about it, the Headmaster called it _Prior Incantatem_ and informed Harry that Voldemort's wand and his own were brothers, sharing the same chore – a feather of a phoenix, Fawkes - and that should prevent them to ever have a real fight. Every time brothers wands met in battle, one of them would be forced to reveal the latest magic performed.

But the worst time was, without a shadow of doubt, their encounter inside de Ministry. Harry was scared for his friends; angry for Sirius's death and wild to get back to Bellatrix. None of his nightmares or visions had prepared him to feel Voldemort really inside his head, controlling his body. The pain, the evilness, the emptiness that was Voldemort, was beyond fear, beyond nightmares, beyond anything Harry knew or ever dreamt of. And he never wanted to feel that ever again.

And it was all these memories that push Harry to learn whatever he could on Occlumency, to study harder his DADA books, and to keep looking for a way to defeat the darker wizard his world had the displeasure of ever have in its midst.

Harry thought that Privet Drive was the safest place for him, besides Hogwarts. At least, Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia would distract Voldemort with their complains about the _'freaks'_ long enough for Harry to escape. If he were anywhere else, everybody who would be close by would be dragged in the fight. Everybody would try to protect or help him and somebody would end up injured or dead. And Harry didn't think he could witness that again. He couldn't survive something like that again.

So, when Dumbledore wrote to tell him he would only leave his uncle's house a week prior the beginning of term and he would spent the rest of his vacations at The Leaky Cauldron with the Weasleys and Hermione, Harry thought was the best solution after all.

And they would be too busy preparing to go back to Hogwarts for him even to dwell on the matter of the prophecy and what to tell – or not to tell – his friends.

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TBC… 


	3. Chapter 02

THE END… AND THE BEGINNING

CHAPTER TWO

Voldemort and his Death Eaters was becoming boulder day by day. They had spend the summer trying to collect more allies and find new ways to disturb the Wizarding world, never worrying – even enjoying - how the Muggle world could or would be affected.

Various attacks on Muggleborns and theirs families filled The _Daily Prophet_ pages practically every day. The other European countries were dragged into the fight, clearly unwilling, but with no way out, since the Death Eaters didn't saw any need to shorten their range or the nationality of their targets.

And the involvement of dark creatures and half-breeds were impossible to ignore. Dumbledore and Harry's first loss that year happened because of those problems. Hagrid was again trying to negotiate with the giants. He was even capable to convince some young ones that the established governments would be easier to deal with than Lord Voldemort would. That is, until some dark creatures – hags, vampires, Dementors and some others – decided that actions were better than words and attacked Hagrid and the group of giants that had chosen to hear him out. Soon enough the entire giant community was involved in the battle, some Aurors popped to try to help, but the Dark Side were in bigger numbers and had definitively planned and prepared for that.

Hagrid didn't survive the fight and he was sent back to Hogwarts literally in pieces. His funeral happened in the small graveyard on the school grounds. Only the staff and some Order's members were present, since it was in the middle of August. Harry found out about it afterwards, through an official communication from Professor McGonagall, as Deputy Headmistress, informing the students and their families about the loss of the gamekeeper and Professor to Care of Magical Creatures, and the reassurance that the school was already looking for replacements.

The minimal details Harry got about what really happened came in a short note from Dumbledore. Harry was angry again with the Headmaster for not informing him sooner, for not let him be present at the ceremony. But even in the few words of the note, Harry could detect Dumbledore's pain and decide to throw his _'tantrum'_ this time over Aunt Petunia's garden.

After that, Harry spent long nights awake, thinking about his big friend. His first contact with the Wizarding world. The person he linked to his escape from the Dursleys and his entrance in this world that, even with all its problems and pains, was his natural place.

His memories helped him to see how much the loss of Hagrid had hurt Dumbledore. In more than one occasion the Headmaster had stated that he trusted the half-giant completely, up to his own life. And Hagrid never made secrecy of his loyalty toward Dumbledore. It was a strange thing to imagining what kind of friendship existed between the wise wizard and the gamekeeper, but the bound was there to everyone to see.

The school year started with a shadow over Hogwarts, its students and faculty. Professor Grubbly-Plank came back to teach Care for Magical Creatures but nothing seemed the same. No strange and dangerous animals to study, no visits to Hagrid's hut when Harry and his friends were feeling down or had time to spare. Everyone in the school felt the hole Hagrid had left in Hogwarts life, even the Slytherins. For the most part, that is.

Harry didn't have any hope that Malfoy and his gang would change paths, so the sniggered comments and open insults were dully ignored by Harry, Ron and Hermione. Sometimes another student would take offence and try to respond, but Malfoy's position as Prefect and Snape continuous protection of the boy and his gang didn't left enough room for that course of action.

And thinking of that, the way Dumbledore kept Malfoy as Slytherin Prefect was one of the worst discussions between Harry and the Headmaster that year.

"How can you keep Malfoy as Prefect, sir, after all he did when in the Inquisitorial Squad?!"

"Dolores Umbridge was the rightful headmistress at that time, Harry. At least, in the eyes of the Ministry. Mr. Malfoy was just following her lead. I can not punish him for obey orders," was the Headmaster's calm answer.

"Obey orders?! That git docked points from all Houses just because he wanted and could do so! He was there when Umbridge threatened me with_Crucio_! He was almost drooling to see me tortured!" Harry was beside himself with anger at this point.

"Harry, that was your interpretation. Remember that you didn't understand Professor Snape acknowledgement of your information also. What Mr. Malfoy did, or felt, can not be judged as an isolate incident. The entire situation..."

"There isn't such thing as an isolate incident! Malfoy is a Death Eather in the making and you're giving him your nod about it!" Harry interrupted Dumbledore, screaming.

The portraits in the Headmaster's office sighed, exclaimed in horror or started to talk about respect and the correct behavior for a student. But Harry was beyond caring. He felt almost as angry as he was in the last June conversation with Dumbledore in this same room.

Dumbledore took a deep breath and looked toward Harry with sad eyes. "Harry, I am not in agreement with Dolores Umbridge's actions or Mr. Malfoy's. And I know what kind of example Draco Malfoy has at home. But I believe that he can mature and learn to choose his own path, if given the opportunity to see other ways to deal with what is happening in our world right now."

Harry stared at Dumbledore for a few moments, his breath sounding like he just ran all the way from the Quidditch pitch to the Headmaster's office without a break. Understanding that there wouldn't be a compromising position in this case for Dumbledore and him, Harry just turned and left the office without another word.

The last thing he heard before the door closed after him was the voice of one of the portraits – Harry thought he recognized Headmaster Dippett's: _"How rude!"_

However, no amount of explanations would convince Harry that Malfoy and his gang deserved any kind of second chances. That Snape would protect them, as Head of their House, as a Death Eather – even if he were really spying for Dumbledore – and as much a git as the rest of the lot, that Harry could understand. But the foolish hope Dumbledore carried around that any of them would change their attitudes or their allegiances was beyond any comprehension Harry could master.

But this was one more stress Harry added to his list. He almost got a real list down, writing about everything that weighted on his shoulders. Then he thought of the risk of something like that falling in the wrong hands – and the wrong ones didn't mean only enemies' ones – and he decided he still had space in his head. Alongside with all the studies and the revisions Hermione was already choking down Ron and Harry's throats.

Harry was able to get almost all the O W.L.s he needed to keep him on the track for the Auror career. But Dumbledore and McGonagall had to interfere with the Potions Master for Harry to attend his N.E.W.T. level classes. If the subject wasn't so important, he would prefer to drop it, but Harry already accepted that there were more important things in his life than to worry about Snape's petty attitudes.

Divination and History of Magic weren't in his schedule anymore and after what happened to Hagrid, Harry lost any interest in Care for Magical Creatures, not worrying to fail the subject he had applied for when he received his O W.L.s results.

The new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was a former professor from Beauxbatons, drawn out of his retirement with the help of Madame Maxime. Not that was a big acquisition after all, because he was really old and made a statement of talking about it all the time. His pains, everything he couldn't do anymore and all the things he did do in the past. On the high note, the man had some knew and interesting tips to pass on to his students. That is, when he was in the mood or could make himself be understood through his thick accent. Although he believed his dominion of the English language was superb.

Because of this situation plus the fervent pushing of the original DA group, Harry saw himself again in the position to fill in for the faults in their DADA academic training. The difference, this time, was that the group could function in public and even had the supervision of a teacher for each encounter. The number of interested students grew alarmingly and included even some Slytherins.

It was quite a situation to handle and Harry counted with Professor McGonagall help to deal with it. They divided the students in various groups, to have manageable numbers, and designated some of the experienced students from the original DA group to bring the new ones up to date. The only ones barred from this training were the first and second year's students – they didn't know enough to accompany the classes – and Malfoy and his gang.

Harry was convinced to have some Slytherins in the DA, but only the ones someone from one of the other Houses would sponsor. And not even Dumbledore was able to deviate Harry on this or of the belief that the likes of Malfoy could be redeemed.

Upon coming back to the school, the option to study Occlumency again with Snape wasn't even mentioned. The solution appeared in the form of the French professor. His methods were outdated and he didn't keep himself exactly on top shape, but Harry was accepting any leads he could get. And anything that didn't put him in more contact with Snape than he really needed was like a gift from heaven.

Harry was able to practice and play Quidditch again. Dumbledore seen to the lift of the banner for him and the Weasley twins. Since Angelina completed her seven years in Hogwarts, the post for Captain of the Gryffindor team was open again. Alicia had also finished school and Katie, the last Chaser remaining, had stated at the end of last year, that she didn't wanted to become Captain. Besides, this would be her N.E.W.T.s year, and she would have enough in her plate.

So Harry, all of a sudden, became the older and most experienced House player available. Professor McGonagall talked to him about the possibility to assume the post of Captain.

Harry's eyes glowed with the idea of become Gryffindor Quidditch Captain. He even started to plan, in his head, schedules for training and to list who could try out for the open spots on the team.

But, then reality came crashing down on him. He couldn't do that. He wouldn't have time. He wouldn't have the patience. And probably enough, most of all, he wouldn't be in the mood to deal with people. He would spend all his available supply of sociability on the DA meetings.

Quidditch was his way to just fly out and forget all his responsibilities and worries. When he focused on the Golden Snitch the rest of the world suddenly disappeared and Harry was alone between the clouds and the blue sky (and the real weather never mattered).

So no, for more tempting the offer sounded, Harry could not accept it. But then, who would do? Right now they had Katie, Ron, Ginny, Sloper and Kirke, the two new Beaters, since the Weasley twins were also out of Hogwarts. Ginny had already said she would prefer a place as Chaser, as soon as Harry was back as Seeker for the team. They still needed one more Chaser and would be nice to have some reserves also. A lot of planning, a lot of thinking, a lot of... strategy!

And whom Harry knew that was really good in strategy_? "Ron! Not even Hermione can beat him in chess. And chess was all about strategy, right?"_ With all these thoughts racing through his head, Harry turned to Professor McGonagall that was still waiting for his answer, rather impatiently, if you could read anything in her closed expression and lips pressed to a thin line.

"Professor McGonagall, I can't deny that I would love this opportunity, but I also know that I have too many responsibilities already. And for all you want Gryffindor to win the Quidditch and the House Cup, I doubt that I fail Potions would be an acceptable exchange."

Harry was rewarded for his comment with a raise of McGonagall's eyebrows. She couldn't fault the young man's reasoning. Her Gryffindor proud wrestled with her teacher's principles and, as she knew all along, the teacher in her won the fight.

"You are right, Mr. Potter. For all my desire to keep the Quidditch and House Cup in Gryffindor hands I wouldn't like to see you jeopardize all the efforts the Headmaster and myself made to get you on Professor Snape's N.E.W.T. class. By your expression, I presume you have an alternative to suggest?"

Harry nodded. "Ron."

"Ronald Weasley?!" Came the surprise answer of McGonagall. "I agree he really improved at the end of last season, but why would you think he has the characteristics required from the Captain of our Quidditch time?"

"Strategy. Planning. Obsession. Passion. Ron has all these for Quidditch. He is really good in strategy. Not even Hermione can beat him in chess. He can be a good planner. When he wants, that is. And he is absolutely obsessively passionate about Quidditch in general. And his brother, Charles, was Gryffindor Quidditch Captain, right? He could give Ron some tips."

Harry was almost glowing. A big smile lightened his face and his eyes looked like real emeralds. The breath caught in Minerva McGonagall's throat. For the first time in a very long while she felt the genuine desire to accept a suggestion, even without taking her time to consider it, just to keep the happiness in Harry's face. It seemed so long ago the last time that a real and broad smile made its presence in the boy's lips that Minerva felt an almost uncontrollable urge to do all in her power to keep it there.

"Well..." She couldn't simple give in. It wouldn't do for her position or her reputation. "I say we can schedule a meeting with the players and talk about this idea. But I have to agree that Mr. Weasley strategy, at least concerning chess, seems really good." The lopsided smile that graced the woman's face was a discreet tribute to the victory Ron achieved over her oversized chess players' set on the boys' first year at Hogwarts.

Harry jumped from the chair. "I can talk to him about it, right? He can be... insecure sometimes. It would be better if he was already convinced when we have this meeting!"

"I thought the meeting was to discuss the possibility of Mr. Weasley assuming the position, not an official confirmation." McGonagall couldn't let the chance pass by. But when the light started to fade from Harry's face, she was quick to reassure the young man.

"But, by all means, go talk and convince Mr. Weasley. It wouldn't do to have an insecure Gryffindor Captain. Not with the Slytherins making petty remarks left and right!" This time wasn't only Minerva desire to please Harry but also her Gryffindor pride talking.

Harry nodded and hurried out of the room. The subsequent conversation he had with Ron wasn't part of his fondest memories. The redheaded could really be stubborn when he chooses to! It took Ginny, Hermione, Harry and half the Gryffindor students for almost half the night to convince Ron that he was the right person for the job.

But the final struck that decided the matter was the late night conversation between Ron and Harry, when both boys were in their beds.

"Harry, you really think this is a good idea?" Ron sounded like he was eleven years old again.

"Ron, remember the Mirror of Erised? Remember what you saw? Yourself as HeadBoy and Quidditch Captain. Well, you're already a Prefect. If you become Gryffindor Captain, you would be just one step away from your vision, right? And with Hermione at your side and in a straight path to become Head Girl, I think you have a lot of chance to get all of it."

"The Mirror of Erised?" Ron seemed lost in his thoughts. "Maybe you're right, mate. Maybe I did saw my future there". And he turned over in his bed, going to sleep with a smile in his face.

Harry also went to sleep smiling. Things would be at least interesting with Ron as Captain. And the Weasley temper should make a few appearances during the Quidditch season this year in Hogwarts.

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TBC…


	4. Chapter 03

_THE END… AND THE BEGGINING_

CHAPTER THREE 

The beginning of the term went by as normally as possible. The news on the _Prophet_ still caused enough stirs in the school and even the correspondence with the families was subject for worry. But it was the Halloween night that added to the unwanted collection of Harry's worst nightmares.

Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny walked around the grounds and relaxed, since the weekends and holidays visits to Hogsmead were canceled because Dumbledore didn't felt his students would be safe enough running around the village.

Ron and Hermione didn't make it official but they were _closer_. During the train ride to Hogwarts they let escape how much they have written to each other during the summer. And how much more meaningful those letters were in comparison to the ones from or for Harry. So it wasn't exactly a surprise to see the couple holding hands around the school. Or even the whispered conversations they shared on their spare time.

Though the four of them were _'walking together'_, Harry and Ginny slowed their steps so they could distance themselves from the other couple. Ron and Hermione, walking hand in hand, didn't notice and when the group decided to sit by the lake, the Prefects chosen a more secluded spot under a low tree branch, while Harry and Ginny plopped on the grass, closer to the lake.

The majority of the students were also walking around the grounds without much purpose or sitting in small groups. But that was better than to stay cooked inside the castle. Various teachers were also on the grounds, walking between the students, trying to be inconspicuous, but clearly there to watch over the lot.

When some friends from Ginny's year came to take her away for some game, Harry told her to go, using his best-rehearsed smile for _"I'm okay"._ Alone, he darted a glance to his friends, now closely embraced under the tree, and decided he wasn't in the mood to be the third wheel today.

All of a sudden, Harry felt this compelling need to go to Hagrid's hut. He hadn't been there since his return to Hogwarts, didn't had the courage. But today, the moment seemed the ideal one to brace the place and all the memories ingrained there.

Harry walked slowly with his head down, purposely avoiding contact. But nobody tried to talk to him or stop him. Everybody was giving him lots of space this year. They weren't running away from him like in second year, afraid he was the Heir of Slytherin. And nothing likes the attitude during the Tri-Wizarding Tournament in his fourth year, when most believe he was a big show-off. Or the slander and persecution on his fifth year, when the Ministry was denying the return of Voldemort. This time it was more like people could understand his need to be alone and when he was accessible. And they respect his moods.

Hagrid's hut was exactly like the last time Harry saw it, before leaving for Privet Drive at the end of last June. The only thing missing was the smoke coming out of the chimney, a sign Hagrid would be close by.

"_Fang!"_ The memory of the hound popped on Harry's mind for the first time. He had completely forgotten about the dog! He didn't know if the animal was with Hagrid or not. If Fang was alive or not. He hadn't seen any sign of the hound since he arrived at Hogwarts.

Harry tried the hut's door purely on instinctive mode. He never thought the door would be unlocked. When the massive wooden door cracked open, Harry jumped in surprise. But by now his desire to see and touch the things close to Hagrid was too much to resist.

He entered the house with small steps, trying to be silent, for no reason at all. He ran his eyes around the room, remembering the many times he had sat there, talking to Hagrid, by himself or with Ron and Hermione. Watching his outrageous pets or just enjoying some tea. When his eyes stopped by the big armchair in front of the fireplace, where Hagrid liked to sit and talk to whoever was visiting, Harry held his breath in a scared surprise.

The chair wasn't empty! Somebody was silently sitting there, with his or her eyes on the unused fireplace. Harry must have made some noise, because the person in the chair moved to look by its side and find out who else was in the hut.

"_Dumbledore"_ Harry recognized the white beard and the half moon glasses_. "I shouldn't be surprise. Of course he would come here. He misses Hagrid too."_

"I'm sorry, sir." Harry tried to back of. "I didn't know somebody would be here. I didn't even think the door would be open. I'll go now." But he didn't move. He didn't want to go away. He even wanted to talk to the Headmaster.

"Harry..." Dumbledore voice was low and husky. "Don't go. Have a sit. We can have some tea, if you want. A homage to our friend?"

Harry nodded and walked to sit by the fireplace too. Dumbledore conjured two teacups and each wizard picked one of the hot beverages and started to take small sips in silence.

"Hagrid's mother left before he was five years old. And he lost his father at the age of twelve. I became his guardian then." Dumbledore spoke out of the blue.

Harry didn't know what to say. He knew bits and pieces of Hagrid's life but didn't feel like discuss it. He chooses to throw in a memory, like Dumbledore just did.

"My first birthday present, real present, was Hedwig. Hagrid bought her when he took me to Diagon Alley after I received my letter."

Both wizards kept silence for a while, sipping their teas. Now and then, a memory, a story would pop out from one of them.

And they talked for quite some time, exchanging their memories of Hagrid. It was soothing in a way Harry had not experienced yet. When the shadows inside the hut indicated the day was ending, Dumbledore urged Harry back to the castle.

"We are having a feast, you know?" The Headmaster tried to imply joy and mystery to the phrase, as if he was telling a well-guarded secret.

Harry just nodded and they left the hut. Harry waited for Dumbledore to lock its door and then remembered his first thought upon reaching the place this afternoon.

"Sir, where's Fang?" And, as an after thought, he also remembered somebody else from Hagrid's family. "And Grawp?"

A profound sigh left Dumbledore's chest. Harry didn't need to hear to know the answer.

"Neither was found. Hagrid took them with him in this trip, but the Aurors that sorted out after the battle never found a trace of the hound and couldn't identify Hagrid's half-brother."

Both wizards walked back to the castle in silence, with the sun setting at their backs. They had reached a degree of understanding and respect for each other's pain.

Harry didn't enjoy the Halloween Feast. His visit to Hagrid's hut and the conversation with Dumbledore helped, but Hagrid's loss was still too close to surface for the half-giant be a good memory instead of a sore injure in Harry's heart.

He went early to bed, avoiding Ron, Hermione and Ginny. Not even their worried stares persuaded him to stay around and play '_pretend everything is okay'_ tonight.

Harry didn't remember falling asleep. He was just lying in his bed, looking at the ceiling, the drapes closed around him, stating clearly his desire for isolation. Then he was sleeping and images were popping in his mind.

_First a dark room, full of people, all dressed in black. Harry saw masked faces staring at him, waiting for his signal. Then he waved his left hand and a group of them disapparated. A second wave and the rest of the audience popped to some place else. Now he was sited, looking in the dark, and letting a cold, cruel and inhuman laugh fill the place._

Harry's scar burst in pain and he started to trash around in his bed. He moaned but couldn't wake up and escape these visions. For the rest of the night Harry's mind accompanied Voldemort while the dark wizard Apparate in different places, checking out the results and achievements of his followers.

_A house burned to the ground. Four bodies lost between the debris, almost unrecognizable as human beings, after the nameless tortures left them distorted in unbelievable forms._

_Another place, what looked like an orphanage or hospital. Rooms and corridors piled with bodies of children and adults, all with an expression of horror in their faces and lifeless open eyes._

_A shop. An old man stoic resisting the tortures when Voldemort Apparate there. This time, the Dark Lord himself finished the job. And the old man was left there, spread over his shop floor, eyes wide open, but no life left in his body._

Harry visited many others places and witnessed too many atrocities. His scar and head burned like he had a high fever and the pain was like having one of his Uncle Vernon's drills trying to open a hole in his skull. He screamed too. No more soft moans. His throat was raw and dry but he couldn't stop screaming.

What Harry didn't know was that his roommates awakened because of the noise and tried desperately to pull him off his nightmare. But no amount of shaking, yelling or even water over his face was capable to wake him up.

While Harry stayed trapped inside Voldemort's mind, Neville run out the dormitory and called Professor McGonagall. Ron sat on his friend bed, his eyes huge, full of fear and despair, his face pale, giving him a sick look where his red hair was the only thing alive.

Not even McGonagall was able to wake up or calm down Harry. She wrapped him up with his bed sheets, trying to control his movements and then levitated him to the Hospital wing.

By then, the entire Gryffindor House was awake and pilled up in the common room. Ginny was chewing her lower lip and embracing her pillow like it was the only thing keeping her afloat. Hermione was crying silently and throw herself in Ron's arms as soon as the boy descended the stairs. Professor McGonagall was irreducible about any of them going to the Hospital wing too. She ordered them to go back to their beds, as if someone could go to sleep without knowing if Harry would be all right.

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TBC…


	5. Chapter 04

_THE END… AND THE BEGGING_

_CHAPTER FOUR_

Professor McGonagall passed through the portrait hole, directing carefully the floating boy and casted a Silence spell right away. If she took the boy through the castle with his screams echoing on the walls, the rest of the students and staff would be awake in five seconds.

The Fat Lady portrait exclaimed in horror after closing the Gryffindor door behind the teacher. McGonagall took the chance to calm the painting and ask for help at the same time:

"Could you, please, pass on that the Headmaster is needed at the Hospital wing? I'll be taking young Mr. Potter there now."

The Fat Lady said a hurried _"Of course",_ while already running out her frame, passing through other paintings, not worried with the havoc she was causing between the sleeping figures.

McGonagall walked as quickly as possible with her charge in front of her. The way the boy was still thrashing, she didn't know how long her _impromptu _mummification with the sheets would last. And even if she couldn't hear anything with the Silence spell working, the boy's open mouth made Minerva shivered, imagining the pain he must be suffering to express himself like that.

Apparently the Fat Lady passed the message to the Headmaster and also to some other paintings. The story spread like fire though the castle. When McGonagall entered the Hospital wing, all the picture frames were bursting with people trying to see what was happening. And not only the Headmaster and Madam Pomfrey waited for her, but aligned behind the two prominent figures were Professors Sprout, Flitwick and Snape.

Minerva explained the situation while depositing the boy in one of the far away beds. Without the control of the Levitation charm, Harry's violent movements rapidly disengaged him from the sheets. McGonagall lifted the Silence charm but anguish and loud cries were still there and made the situation even tenser.

Madam Pomfrey re-established the charm right away and started to examine the boy. She run diagnostic spells, tried some soothing charms, but nothing helped. Harry was still caught inside Voldemort's mind, his own head full of uncontrolled nightmares. The matron finally gave up, saying she didn't know anything else to try, and maybe they should contact St. Mungo's.

Dumbledore and Snape stepped in to try Legilimency and discover what was happening to Harry. Professor McGonagall and Madam Pomfrey had to hold the boy and the two wizards lifted his eyelids, trying to focus in Harry's eyes. But even they were moving fast and uncontrollable, as following too many things at the same time, or as if looking desperately for a way out of this nightmare.

"I can't make sense of this. He seems lock inside his own mind. I don't know why we can't wake him up, though." Snape sneered his comment, but was clear to all his concern. Withdraw to his most cold behavior was a sign of frustration that his efforts weren't helping.

"Albus...?" Professor Sprout spoke for the first time, her eyes full of anxiety.

The Headmaster had one hand over Harry's head, trying to transmit some comfort. A very difficult endeavor, since the boy was still trashing, arms and legs flying around and his head shaking from side to side. The other hand of the old wizard was running through his beard, distractedly.

"The only explanation I can think of is that Harry is caught inside Lord Voldemort's mind. Witnessing the same things tonight."

"What you mean: 'witnessing the same things'?" Professor Sprout asked again.

Snape answered curtly. "It's Halloween. The Dark Lord's favorite holiday."

Dumbledore voice transmitted his weariness. "I was in my office when one of the portraits passed your message, Minerva. I had already received information about two Death Eathers' attacks tonight. And I was waiting for the confirmation of, at least, three more sightings of the Dark Mark."

"You are saying that Mr. Potter is witnessing all that through You-Know-Who's mind?" It was the scandalized question from Madam Pomfrey.

"Exactly. We already knew about the mental connection between Harry and Voldemort. But the Occlumency lessons appeared to be helping. He hadn't any more visions since coming back to Hogwarts. At least, that was what he told me." The Headmaster answered, subtly let been known that his relationship with Harry wasn't on the best terms right now. He _Accio_ a chair silently and sat by Harry's bedside.

"He must been telling the truth. We all know when Mr. Potter is having nightmares. He become distracts in classes. He isolates himself more often. And Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley become quite agitated and nervous themselves. None of them were like this on the last couple of months. Mr. Weasley is extremely enthusiastic about his new position as Quidditch Captain. Miss Granger is already following a schedule to revise for the N.E.W.T.s. And Mr. Potter has been quite successful with the DA meetings." Professor McGonagall spoke quietly but with certainty.

"To my regret, I must agree with Professor McGonagall analyzes. Mr. Potter had even made some improvements in my class. Speaking comparatively to his academic past." Snape contributed in a low voice.

"So, we are back to the explanation that Harry is trapped inside Voldemort's mind. Maybe Harry was too relaxed and this assault was too strong. Maybe he didn't exercised Occlumency before going to sleep and Voldemort would be in a high emotional state tonight. But looks like we will only know when Harry wake up." Dumbledore said without taking his eyes of the boy in the bed, still trashing and screaming silently.

Professor Sprout murmured something about checking her stock of healing plants and left the room with small and quiet steps.

Professor Flitwick, speaking for the first time, started to list a series of healing charms from memory and informed that he would be in his office, researching his books on medicinal charms.

Madam Pomfrey shooed the people cramped in the Hospital wing pictures, telling them to go back to their own portraits.

The only noise in the room now came from Harry's bed, which trembled with his uncontrolled movements. His face contorted in pain, his open mouth and the stressed neck indicating the boy agony.

"Albus..." Madam Pomfrey started with a soft voice. "If this went on for too long..." She couldn't control a sob. "Albus, this could destroy the boy's mind!" She finished with a high note.

Minerva McGonagall fought to suppress a scream herself. The sound died at her lips, but was carried around the big room between the stillness of the others.

Dumbledore wasn't touching Harry anymore. His head was down, evading the eyes of the others. His answer sounded as his voice hadn't been used in a long time and now was being dragged out from the depths of his chest.

"I know, Poppy. If the time he is locked in Voldemort's mind doesn't do it, the images he's seeing may. Harry will have a few more mental scars after tonight, no matter how this ends. Unfortunately, we can't do anything now, except wait and hope for this torment to end soon."

"Headmaster," Snape spoke quietly. "I wasn't _informed_ of any plans for tonight."

"I know, Severus. It would be too obvious if you were away from the school during the Halloween weekend. Especially with the news _The Daily Prophet_ should publish soon."

A clock in the distance chimed once, indicating the time. It was one hour in the morning of November 1st.

The four adults jumped to attention when the pattern of Harry's movements changed. His body went rigid for a moment, almost getting out of the bed. Then the boy wasn't trashing anymore. He went absolutely relaxed and still. At a distance, wasn't even possible to see if his chest was moving, if he was breathing.

Madam Pomfrey and Dumbledore were immediately by Harry's side. The matron started to perform diagnostic spells and the Headmaster put his hand over the boy's chest, needing an unquestionable confirmation that he was alive.

"Mr. Potter seems physically unharmed. Exhausted, with a sore throat and some fever, but that would be expected." Madam Pomfrey talked quickly to calm down the others in the room.

"Mr. Potter didn't wake up." Stated Professor McGonagall.

"His mind and body are exhausted. I believe he needs to rest before wake up." Madam Pomfrey answered, a bit uncertain.

"Seems?! Believe?!" Professor Snape snapped. "I would say that we need a more detailed appreciation of Potter condition."

Madam Pomfrey gulped and rose herself to her full height. It was her turn to snap: "This was a quick assessment of his condition. Of course I'll do a more complete and detailed diagnostic to determine what treatment will be better for Mr. Potter for now on!"

Dumbledore interfered: "What is important, right now, is that Harry isn't locked in Voldemort's mind anymore. Poppy will take care of him, as always exceeding in her talents. Severus, could you inform Filius and Pomona where we stand now? After Poppy indicates the treatment, we'll see what potions or charms are needed."

Professor Snape turned with a flick of his robes and walked quickly but silently out of the Hospital wing.

Professor Snape went directly to his office and contacted Professor Flitwick and Sprout from there. He also implied that the Headmaster would prefer that the details of the night's event wouldn't be spread out for all the school. Dumbledore didn't said that much, but Snape knew how the mind of the wizard worked – most of the time, anyway - and this was something linked to the Order and not a subject for breakfast table conversation. Then he went back to the corridor of the dungeon to find a portrait and pass on the same warning: no comments!

"Minerva, I believe it would be prudent to go to the Gryffindor common room and deliver some news. At least three of the students would be awake and anxious for information, if not more." Minerva McGonagall nodded in agreement and walked away without noise also.

"Poppy..." The Headmaster's voice dropped a notch and became softer. "We really need to determine the possible damages to Harry's mind. We need to know, as quickly as possible, that he hasn't suffered any permanent..." He couldn't finish.

"Yes, Albus, I know. We can do it together now. Without Severus and Minerva, there is considerable less tension here. But I still think that a Healer from St. Mungo's will be necessary."

"Let's seen what we can do first. It wouldn't be safe to take Harry to St. Mungo's right now. Bring a Healer here will need some planning."

Madam Pomfrey and Dumbledore worked together, at each side of Harry's bed. The sky was starting to color with the first rays of the raising sun when the wizard and witch sat down, exhausted after a night without any sleep, the tension of waiting and the efforts on the diagnostic and healing spells.

"At the top of my capacity, I would say there isn't any permanent damage to Mr. Potter's mind. He is in a healing sleep. His mind shut down to cope with what he went through. His body will recuperate much more easily and quickly, no doubt. We can start with some strengthening charms and potions, even with him still asleep." Madam Pomfrey decreed in a tired voice.

Dumbledore had a more relaxed expression on his face, but his eyes were still shadowed with worry.

"I'll arrange for a Healer from St. Mungo's to come here. A Healer used to deal with patients with mental and emotional scars. When do you believe Harry will wake up?"

"It's difficult to predict something like that. I believe the Muggles have a word for his state: _'coma'_. The mind shut down all contact with the exterior world and focus in healing itself and the body. The time needed depends on the person and the injures. Let's start helping healing his body and taking that effort from his mind."

Dumbledore nodded to sign his agreement and stand up. "Do you need Severus or any of the others right now?"

"I don't think so. I'll start with the simple potions and charms. Along the day we should have some response and then we can re-think Mr. Potter's treatment. This Healer from St. Mungo's, you think this person could be here today, Albus? The quicker we address this issue..."

The Headmaster cut in on the matron speech. "I know, Poppy. Time is of essence here. I'll make sure that the school will run smoothly and try to keep this as much a secret as possible. Or at least, make sure that the minimum information run around the walls." The old wizard walked away, without noise and quickly, but his posture indicated his weariness and age.

Madam Pomfrey shook her head, thinking that the Headmaster carried too much weight for just a single person, powerful or non-powerful wizard. And then she turned all her attention to the boy lying in front of her.

Professor McGonagall walked briskly back to Gryffindor tower and had to give some information before the Fat Lady opened up for her to enter. McGonagall stopped surprise at the door. The common room was packed. There were students sleeping on the floor, sitting in chairs with their heads resting over their hands. Some first years were sleeping over the tables! On the corner closer to the fireplace, she saw Neville Longbottom sat on the sofa, his head lying back and his mouth open, snoring quietly. By his side, Ginny Weasley was still hanging to her pillow, apparently asleep, with her head down. On the armchair were Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley. The girl curled up on the boy's lap, sleeping with her head on his shoulders. The tall boy had his legs spread over the carpet in front of him and his head rested over the girl's bushy brown hair.

Minerva McGonagall considered the best way to deal with the situation. If she tiptoed around the students, they would never believe that Potter was all right. Shouting to the group at one thirty in the morning didn't seem the best way to give some inconclusive news also. She set for conjuring a bell and made it sound as a waking call.

In less than five minutes she had the attention of all the Gryffindors students. _"I'll have to remember this whenever I need to talk to this lot",_ Minerva thought.

"I clearly remember telling you all to go back to your dormitories. This is not a party or a sleepover! Prefects, you should have taken care of that! First years sleeping on tables!"

Hermione Granger got up with some speed, but her puffed and red eyes spoke of a lot of tears and very little sleep. The first to be back in control of himself was Ron Weasley.

"How's Harry?" He asked in an urgent and high voice.

McGonagall thought again about dismissing everybody and talk only with the three students' closer to Mr. Potter. But the anxiety and tension she could feel on the room changed her mind.

"He is sleeping now. He's running a fever and has a sore throat. Madam Pomfrey is taking care of him." Before the obvious question was raised, she continued quickly. "Tomorrow, or latter today, after breakfast, you three will be able to visit him. Now everybody back to your own beds!" And keeping a firm note but lowing her voice, the teacher completed: "I think I don't need to stress how important it is that what happened tonight isn't spread around the castle with... legendary proportions."

The grunts and nods of agreement went on with the line of students ascending the stairs to go back to their dormitories. In a few minutes the only ones standing in the Gryffindor common room were Professor McGonagall, Hermione Granger, Ginny and Ron Weasley. The eyes of the three students didn't left the teacher's face. They were solemn and worried. Both girls had red eyes and were clear the effort the Weasley boy was making to keep his control.

"He's... he's really alright?" Hermione asked between sobs.

Minerva took pity of the trio. She walked closer and rested a hand over Ginny's shoulder.

"Mr. Potter had a difficult night. I believe you three know about Mr. Potter and You-Know-Who unique connection. This time was a bit harder on Mr. Potter. But he is really sleeping now and Madam Pomfrey is taking care of him. If there is need for something more, the Headmaster will provide. You don't need to worry. Go to your beds; try to rest a little. After the breakfast, I'll escort you to the Hospital wing."

"Thank you, Professor McGonagall." Hermione spoke with a firmer voice now. "And I'm sorry I wasn't able to keep up with my Prefects duties... I... I think... I believe I really lost control and..." The girl couldn't continue.

"Miss Granger, you are a formidable force and very responsible in all your duties. This situation was completely out of ordinary and out of your control. I will not think less of you for not _'handling'_ your Prefects duties. That was more to wake up and distract the rest of the students than any kind of reprimand. Go to sleep. With the sun up things will look brighter."

The three students nodded and went up the stairs. McGonagall waited until hearing all the doors closing before letting go a sigh and turned to leave the common room and went back to her owns quarters, thinking about getting some rest herself. Dumbledore would be too busy with Mr. Potter. She would have to take care of the rest of the school.

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TBC…


	6. Chapter 05

_THE END… AND THE Beginning_

_CHAPTER FIVE_

Professor McGonagall entered the great hall with brisk steps while the room was full of students. She walked directly to the great table where almost all the staff was present. The only ones missing were the French teacher, always a late arrival, and Madam Pomfrey.

The House's tables were in their usual agitated state for a Saturday morning. Even if the visits to Hogsmead had been canceling, they still had the entire weekend free and a Quidditch game on Sunday afternoon.

"_Thanks Merlin the first game this year will be between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. This will save us a great deal of explanation."_ McGonagall thought while sitting by the Headmaster's right side.

"Minerva, I hope you had the chance to rest a bit." Dumbledore's voice was low; trying to avoid other's ears. After McGonagall nodded, he continued: "Could you pass this message to Mr. Weasley, please? As soon as possible. And I'm sorry to ask you to stall any visits to the Hospital wing until later in the afternoon."

Minerva looked toward the Headmaster but his eyes showed only tiredness, nothing more alarming. He stood up and left a small bit of parchment by his plate. McGonagall nodded agreement again and pocketed the message with a discreet gesture.

The Slytherins and the Ravenclaws were in full force, discussing Quidditch in their tables. The Hufflepuffs were their usual lot but acted no less as teenagers as any of the rest, with girls' giggles been heard from different points of their table. The Gryffindor table was unusually quiet ones. Most of the presents had puffed eyes and sleepy faces, and were eating without much enthusiasm. The students tried a few bites, a bit of juice, but were soon out of there in small groups. The ones that didn't seemed incline to leave the table, even if they were not pretending to eat, were Mr. Potter's three closest friends.

McGonagall finished her sparse meal and walked purposely toward the three Gryffindors. The teacher slowed her steps when she notices another student making her way to the same place. Luna Lovegood approached the table with her apparently permanent aloof state and talked to Ginny Weasley. The girl jumped in surprise; because she was so distracted before that she hadn't heard or felt Luna's arrival at her side. McGonagall continued to approach the students, but more quietly, wanting to hear the exchange between the teenagers.

"Hi, Ginny! You all seemed a bit tired today. You took the party to your common room then, last night?"

"Er... Hi, Luna. I... Well... I think I just didn't sleep enough," Ginny answered lamely, trying to catch Ron and Hermione's eyes to ask for help. But the couple didn't react until Luna's next question:

"And where's Harry? He hasn't come to breakfast yet."

Hermione straighten herself and Ron's ears started to get pink. McGonagall decided to interfere before the wrong words went flying around.

"Mr. Potter exceeded himself in the feast, Miss Lovegood. He's nursing a stomachache."

While the three Gryffindors jumped in surprise with their teacher's voice, Luna just turned to face McGonagall with her huge and profound eyes.

"Oh. I can see how some celebrations can upset everyone's stomach. I hope Harry gets better soon." She started to turn, for the others' relief, but stopped in the middle of the movement and took something out of her bag.

"Have you seen the _Daily Prophet _today? I don't usually read this kind of government propaganda, but my father sent it to me. He thought I should know what's been spread around." She left the paper over the table, closer to Ron. Her eyes continued to seem aloof and not focusing anywhere. "And isn't interesting, that the owl post didn't arrived today? I wonder if all the owls were sick also because of yesterday's holiday." And with this last remark, the girl walked away with her bag bouncing at her side and her wand behind her ear.

Ron attacked the paper, opening it to read the headlines.

_**NIGHT OF TERROR! AT LEAST TEN CONFIRMED DEATH EATERS'S ATTACKS! THE DEATH TOLL SHOULD SURPASS HUNDREDS, BETWEEN WIZARDS AND MUGGLES!**_

Below the scary headline, a photo of a group of Aurors trying to shield the front door of a shop, but the figures moving in the picture permitted a glimpse of a body spread over the floor inside the house.

McGonagall took the paper from Ron's hands in a swift movement. Hermione's eyes were drowning in tears and Ginny Weasley didn't seem able to close her mouth. Ron's face went from red to completely white, with his freckles and red hair giving him quite a sick look.

"Compose yourselves!" Professor McGonagall schooled the three teenagers. "Mr. Weasley, here is a message from the Headmaster. I suggest you read it and comply with whatever he is asking immediately. The visit I talked about will only be possible with his permission."

"But, Professor!" Hermione started to argue.

"Miss Granger!" The girl dropped her head but McGonagall could see her hands trembling on her lap. "This is not a punishment to any of you. This is in Mr. Potter's best interests. I would advice, Mr. Weasley, to be quick about the Headmaster request. I can promise I will take the three of you to the Hospital wing, personally, as soon as possible." Minerva McGonagall used her best Head of House tone to transmit confidence to the students.

Three bowed heads nodded and McGonagall walked away, not satisfied with the situation but at least appeased for a while.

Ron opened the parchment, read it, shot a quick glance to Hermione and re-read the message.

"What it says, Ron?" Ginny asked impatiently.

The paper in the boy's hands started to smoke and in a few seconds was transformed in ashes, almost like a howler. Hermione raised her eyebrows and stared unblinkly into Ron's eyes. Ginny, as an outside in this relationship, didn't understand anything and started to feel really annoyed. The couple in front of her seemed to be communicating through their eyes, without a word. The younger Weasley wasn't in the mood to be left out.

"Ron Weasley!" Some heads on their table and a few others close by looked around to find out what could have ignited the Weasley temper. Some smiles and giggles died quickly at the vision of Ginny's red face.

"Ginny, be quiet!" Ron tried to talk in a low voice. "Dumbledore asked me to take something to his office. I'll ask about visiting Harry." He stood up and walked out of the Great Hall.

Hermione and Ginny extended annoyed looks but sighed and stood up together to leave the room. They walked behind Ron to the Gryffindor common room, but stayed there while the boy went to his dormitory. He came back quickly but neither girl could see what he might be carrying to give the Headmaster. Ron exited through the portrait hole and the girls decided to wait for answers sat by the fireplace.

As a Prefect, Ron knew the password to enter Dumbledore's office – Snackbox - and after arriving at the top of the staircase, he knocked once on the door, that opened by itself and Ron advanced into the room, looking around for Dumbledore.

"Ah, Mr. Weasley, quickly and quietly. Very well done. Especially while dealing with Misses Granger and Weasley."

Ron tried to pretend he hadn't jumped at the Professor's voice that sounded like had come from inside a wall.

"Er... Yes, sir. The girls were in a state, alright. But, well, I promised them to ask about visiting Harry, so..." The boy was fidgeting, his head bowed, not wanting to face the older wizard.

Dumbledore walked out of what was really a closet, with its front door made of rocks just like the rest of the room's walls.

"Of course. Bargaining is quite an effective method to deal with females. Especially distressed ones. The only thing you have to worry about is your capability to keep up with your part of the bargain. Women, no matter their ages, can be real feisty about unfulfilled promises."

With that remark, Ron's head snapped up, his eyes huge in a very pale face. He encountered a worried face but the Headmaster's eyes had its usual twinkle of mischief.

"I believe you brought what I asked for?"

"Yes, sir." Ron pulled a bundle from his robes' pocket and delivered Harry's invisibility cloak to Dumbledore.

"I have to see that all that is possible is done to help Mr. Potter's recovery. And secrecy is an unquestionable necessity. I'll permit you three to visit him as soon as I felt it would be safe for all." Dumbledore spoke calmly, with a warm voice, but a definitive tone that didn't left space for arguing or bargaining. "It would be better if you didn't spend the day just sitting in your common room. Try to do something to distract yourselves. As soon as possible Professor McGonagall will accompany you to the Hospital wing."

Ron nodded and shifted in place, not quite sure what to do now.

"Go now, Mr. Weasley. Do try to have a peaceful day."

As soon as the door closed behind the student, the Headmaster walked to the fireplace and tossed some Floo powder in.

"You may come now."

Seconds after, the fire blazed green and first a young woman with pink and spike hair appeared. Close behind her come an older version of the girl but with black hair. Both women nodded to Dumbledore but didn't speak. He held out the invisibility cloak to them and walked to the door.

The Headmaster casted some spells to keep students out of their path to the Hospital wing. Upon arriving there, Madam Pomfrey closed and locked the door after them. Dumbledore casted a few more charms to insure their complete privacy, making even the figures in the portraits go away to other pictures in the castle.

Andromeda Tonks took off the invisibility cloak, leaving it in her daughter's hands. She walked quickly to Harry's bed, raised her wand and started to do some diagnostic spells. Dumbledore, Madam Pomfrey and Tonks stood a bit far back, not wanting to interfere with the Healer's work, but not missing whatever was happening. Next Andromeda pulled a chair, sat by Harry's bedside and started to concentrate, touching Harry's and her own head with the tip of her wand in repetitive movements. Besides the elaborate breathing that attested the effort and concentration done by Andromeda, no other noise could be detected in the big room.

Dumbledore could now relate completely with Mr. and Miss Weasley and Miss Granger. _"This waiting, without knowing, is one of the worse kind of torture imaginable."_

The time passed without anyone present in the Hospital wing take notice. When Andromeda finally stood up, a bit wobbly, her daughter run to help her balance herself. Madam Pomfrey offered the Healer a glass of water and a cup with a strengthening potion in quick succession. Dumbledore stayed back, waiting for the diagnostic.

"Thank you, Madam Pomfrey," Andromeda said in a tired voice. She inhaled profoundly and continued: "Harry is in a healing sleep. The simple potions and charms should take care of his body. I did what I could to help his mind."

The other three adults in the room let go relieved sighs.

"I believe the boy will sleep, at least, until tomorrow. And this will be for the best. No problem to let their friends visit, but a calm and soothing environment is essential. After he wake up, I advice continuous sessions of meditation to help him relax, so he won't relieve this nightmare." Andromeda kept her _'healer voice'_ going, even if her face showed all her personal worry for the boy. "A period without much stress would be helpful. Cut a bit in the studies, and have more time for relaxation and recreation."

Dumbledore nodded in understanding. Madam Pomfrey went looking for the healing potions she was administrating to Harry in regular intervals. Tonks and Andromeda come closer to the Headmaster.

"He will need to talk about it. I don't know who would be the best person, but Harry can't let this fester inside himself. For what Nymphadora let escape, he hasn't finished mourning Sirius when Hagrid was also lost."

Dumbledore nodded again. "I know Harry blamed himself for the situation that end up with Sirius' death."

Andromeda sighed sadly and Tonks let out exasperated snot.

"Teenagers have the custom to look at the world as if it revolves around them," the Headmaster went on. "In Harry's case, this wouldn't be too far from the truth. The Wizarding world, specially now, revolves around him and Voldemort."

Dumbledore ignored the shudders that passed through the two witches. And continued to speak while watching Madam Pomfrey's ministrations. "I also don't know who would be the best person to talk to Harry now about this. The two of us are not in the best terms at the moment. To help Harry's recovery of this situation, we need someone he would listen to."

"Remus?" Tonks suggested.

"Maybe. I'll ask Remus to drop by and try to talk to Harry. I'll also speak with his friends and indicate the path to follow in this instance." Dumbledore accepted the young witch suggestion and started to make plans in his head.

Madam Pomfrey finished her ministrations over Harry and turned to the others. "He will sleep peaceful. He doesn't have a fever anymore and two more doses of the _Sorethroath Potion_ should take care of this problem. The sleep will help on the rest for the body. As for his mind, we'll know when he wakes up."

With a few parting words, the Tonks women disappeared again under the invisibility cloak and followed the Headmaster back to his office, after the spells were lifted from the Hospital wing.

Dumbledore wrapped the cloak carefully and put it away in one of his desk's drawers after the witches left through the fireplace. He, then, sat in a comfortable armchair in front of the fire and pounded about the situation before talking with the Gryffindors students and Professor McGonagall.

Ginny, Hermione and Ron were sited by the pumpkin patch near Hagrid's hut. The teenagers tried to enter the house but the door was locked and the simple opening spells didn't work. Hermione wasn't in the mood to try any advanced ones she might know. So the three just sat on the ground, resting against the big pumpkins growing freely around.

Ron had pass on the Headmaster's advice when he went back to the common room and found the two girls lost in thoughts in front of the fire. They walked aimless around the castle for a while, but a close escape from Malfoy and his goons took them outside, looking for a place to brood in peace.

"What you think Harry was dreaming about?" Ron inquired quietly after a long silence.

"About what the _Daily Prophet_ published, no doubt." Hermione answered in a low and professorial tone. "Like the time, last year, when he saw your dad being attacked."

"After those headlines, there isn't any discussion if his visions this time were real or not." Ginny stated in a dark voice.

"Harry told us he didn't have any dreams or visions of You-Know... V... Voldemort since coming back to Hogwarts," Hermione tried to keep her voice firm.

Ron let out a sigh but didn't complain about the use of the Dark Wizard name. "He was really fine. Not that Professor Bobadier is a great help, but Harry was sleeping better. And he was happy about the DA meetings. He said my plans for the Quidditch team were good." Ron said quietly.

"Why now?!" Ginny stood up and started to pace. "Harry was relaxing; he was starting to be okay! This will ruin everything! He'll start brooding again! He'll relive everything bad that happened to him since he learnt about magic!" The girl was incense, her voice getting louder by each word.

"Ginny!" Hermione tried to call the other girl to order. "We don't have answers to that. We only know that V... Voldemort will keep pursuing his evil plan and that Harry, sometimes, gets caught in the middle of it." Hermione sighed. "All we can do is try to help him go through all this. We can show him that we are there for him. We are his friends and we will help how, when and wherever we can!"

"Wise words and commendable intentions, Miss Granger." Dumbledore's voice startled the three students. Ron and Hermione stood up quickly, and the three turned to face the Headmaster.

"Sir! Can we visit Harry now?" Ron asked impatiently.

"Yes, you will see Mr. Potter in a moment. But first, I have to talk with you." Dumbledore took his wand from his robe's sleeve and unlocked Hagrid's hut in silence.

The group went inside the house and sat scattered around the room. Dumbledore leaned on the fireplace and took a careful measure of the students in front of him. Their impatience was clear, but they waited in silence until the Headmaster was ready to talk.

"Mr. Potter is still asleep. He should stay so until tomorrow, at least. It's a healing sleep, nothing to cause worry." Dumbledore started, keeping his attention on the teenagers. "You may visit him today, but Madam Pomfrey says he needs a very restful and soothing environment, so don't stay too long or do something to disturb Harry's rest."

"Sir," Hermione started, "what happened to him? He had other nightmares and visions, but nothing like that..." The girl seemed lost and a bit afraid.

Dumbledore inhaled profoundly and swept the students with a grave stare: "At this moment, we can only theorize about what happened. Probably, Harry was unprepared for the power of Lord Voldemort's emotions last night." He ignored the discreet shudder from the Weasleys. "I can say, with certainty, that what Harry had to witness yesterday was far worse than anything he had to face so far."

"We saw the _Prophet_'s headlines," Ron told in a low and angry voice.

"Is that so?" Dumbledore raised an eyebrow. "The owls weren't suppose to _'arrive'_ this morning"

"Luna's father sent her the paper. She passed it to us." Ron answered.

Hermione stared at the Headmaster. "Professor, you think is wise to hide something like this?"

"Miss Granger, this isn't a question of hiding or denying information to the students. It's more a decision regarding their peace of mind. They will know soon enough. I just tried to buy some time." Dumbledore's voice was weary and the students could see the weight of the wizard's age appearing in his posture.

"This is a question of morals. If the fear spread wide, it will be even more difficult to find people interested in oppose the Dark Lord. If the information comes with more... _'clarity''_, with less sensationalism, then if would be possible to revert the fear in justifiable anger and desire to put things right."

The students were quiet and entranced in the teacher's speak.

"Like I said in the Leaving Feast two years ago, after Cedric's death: it's a question to choose what is right and not what is easy. But the right choice can be closer if people were in the right frame of mind. We need to stand together or all will be lost." Dumbledore finished and sighed. "Enough of an old man's philosophy. Let's go to the Hospital wing so you can take a look at Mr. Potter. He should be awake tomorrow and then you can have a real visit with him." The Headmaster walked toward the door and waited for the students to come out of the house to lock it again.

The group walked back to the castle and Dumbledore left the Gryffindors with Professor McGonagall that was waiting by the entrance of the building. They walked in silence to the Hospital wing and there, the three teenagers stood by Harry's bed, just looking to his relaxed expression in this healing sleep.

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TBC...


End file.
